it all comes full circle...

Coming from a dysfunctional alcoholic family it has taken me my entire life to figure out what was wrong with me. My family kept telling me what was wrong with me and I listened to them.

But listening to the very people who made you sick is like taking heart medicine for my diabetes. I am never going to get better if I am taking the wrong meds (I don't have diabetes btw).

You see, I had no idea that my father's alcoholism had any affect on me whatsoever. Not until it was suggested by my therapist I attend an Al-Anon meeting a year and a half ago did everything come full circle.

When I walked into Al-Anon I felt like I was coming home. But a more functional healthier home. This was my family. They understood. And the best part is...they had a solution!

What does this have to do with postpartum depression or postpartum anxiety? I believe that if you came from an unhealthy family environment, your chances of developing PPD or PPA probably increase ten-fold. Particularly if you have no idea that you were living in an unhealthy environment while growing up.

I never got any anxiety or depression until I was in my 30's. It started out as anxiety and it was horrific because I didn't know what was wrong with me and I thought I was suddenly going insane.

The severe depression came later in life and if I had to choose between the two I would take your garden variety depression over anxiety any day.

So what did I get after having my second child? Severe, severe Postpartum Anxiety. It was horrific!

But I survived. I survived through getting on the Internet and Googling Postpartum Anxiety and Depression to death.

Through reading that others went through the same thing and survived is what kept me hanging on.

You can hang on too. Keep on reading on.

You can do it!

toxic people...

Toxic people in your life can continue your Postpartum Depression and Anxiety.

The difficulty lies in determining who is toxic. Unfortunately, when you are in the deep depths of postpartum depression you cannot recognize who those toxic friends or family members might be. But you can bet they are prolonging your agony.

To get better you need to just keep reading. Keep reading anything you can about postpartum depression and anxiety. It is what will keep you going and it will validate your pain.

Once validated only then can you begin to heal...well, you can begin to heal despite validation for sure, but it helps.

To Your Climb Out of the Darkness...!